“Social Workers: Giving and Receiving the Gift of End-of-Life Support”
By Elena Sherr

The hospice social worker witnesses the most vulnerable time in a person’s life: the end of life. End-of-life can look like a final trip to the casino, family gatherings and celebrations, laughter, and readiness to “meet my maker.” But it can also look like unfinished business, family conflict, regret, estrangement, painful goodbyes, and last breaths.

Bearing witness to intimate moments, usually reserved for family and close loved ones, is a gift bestowed on the hospice social worker who is granted access others are not. Secrets are revealed—sometimes for the first time—regrets, hopes, dreams, and wishes are shared with the unassuming confidant who is invited to be part of the conversations between parents and children, children and parents, grandparents, grandchildren, friends, lovers, neighbors, and lonely souls abandoned for reasons unknown or justifiable.

There are moments that are beautiful to witness and tensions that are difficult to untangle. There is love, contempt, anger, denial, sadness, and love again. Dutifully, the hospice social worker offers a listening ear, reassurance, a comforting word, and help to navigate overwhelming tasks and systems to ensure no loose ends are left untied.

“How can you do this work?” The hospice social worker is often asked. But this question is familiar and usually evokes a knowing smile.

End-of-life work is meaningful, spiritual and grounding. The hospice social worker is reminded, everyday, how precious life is and how nothing is guaranteed.

The hospice social worker is grateful for the good days, for family, friends and furry companions. When the hospice social worker gets upset, angry or starts to fret over the little things—the clothes that aren’t folded, the messy house uncleaned—they go to work and gain perspective on what is truly important.

It is this understanding and perspective granted by engagement in, and observance of, a person’s end-of-life, in all its richness (dark and light) that the most valuable opportunity is presented to the hospice social worker: to live a life of love and meaning.